Top Five Nightmare Jobs!

1. Tech Support- This would have to be the worst job I can think of. People calling you every day and complaining, and then getting angry at you for no apparent reason. I mean, no one ever calls Tech Support to say, "Hey, my computer's running fine and your doing a great job!"

2. U.S. Military Soldier in Iraq-
For risking their life on a daily basis, these people get Less than $2000 dollars a month, with lower ranks starting at $1000. Add that to inadequate body armor, and you've got a nightmare job.

3. Recycling Plant Worker- They sift through garbage to pull out any salvagable recyclables. Easily the most nauseating on this list, they sort through everything from rotting meat to hypodermic needles, all for minimum wage.

4. Hazmat Diver- They swim into clouds of waste, inside nuclear reactors and through toxic spills on America’s coasts and inland waterways. When the Environmental Protection Agency identifies pollutants, it contracts with a hazmat team to clean things up. That means using giant vacuums to suck up a polluted lakebed, hoisting leaking barrels to the surface, or diving into the heart of an oil spill or into a sewer to fix a clog.

5. Being Mike Rowe- Host of Dirty Jobs on the Discovery Channel, this guy has done over 150 dirty jobs, from sewer cleaner to Alligator Farmer. He started the series in honor of his father, who was a pig farmer for most of his life, and tries out jobs that make civilized life for the rest of us possible.

Survey: What's the worst job you've ever had? Leave a comment!

-Mer
Questions or Comments, or have a story idea? Contact Mer at purplepineappletown@hotmail.com

Haunt Your Own Yard in Ten Easy Steps!

1. A Fog Machine-
The first step for haunting your yard is a fog machine to create that eerie atmosphere. As a bonus you could find one to go near your candy bowl that's shaped like something creepy, such as a Beating Heart Fogger.

2. Strategically Placed Strobe Lights-
Combining your fog machine with strategically placed strobe lights is a must in order to get that Haunted House feeling for your yard. Place either one large one next to the fog machine or many small ones around your yard, depending on the size of area you want to cover.

3. Spooky Music-
Spooky Music is a must if you’re going to haunt your own house. You can find the spooky sounds CD's pretty much anywhere that they sell Halloween stuff, I even found some at the Dollar Store today. If you have a multiple CD player, I would suggest getting several, so you don't have to loop just one CD over, and over, and over. (Trust me, it gets annoying after the second hour or so)

4. Skeletons-
Skeletons are a staple of haunted houses and decorators alike. Try to look for ones that aren't just plain, like this Evil Pumpkin, or the Hanging Melting Flesh skeleton. Of course, you could always go for the standard Glow Skeleton, but that's not nearly as much fun.

5. Scary Jack-O-Lantern(s)-
Scary Jack-O-Lanterns are an absolute must have. They can get downright eerie when added to a display or just by themselves. To avoid the wind blowing out your candle (and that black burnt spot on your pumpkin from the heat), grab a pack of LED tea light flickering candles. They won't blow out in the wind and look like the real thing. The only downside is they cost about $3 for a pack of two. (We found ours at Hobby Lobby) But if you think about it, that's pretty cheap since you can use them over and over again, and it will run for 24+ hours before you have to replace the button cell battery.

6. Creepy Cobwebs-
A lot of people discount the 99 cent bags of cobwebs with plastic spiders mixed in them. They're cheap, and stretched over a dead tree or bush, look pretty darn creepy in the dark. Downsides are that it takes a long time to stretch it out to make it look like a web, and it's nearly impossible to get all of it off.

7. A Coffin-
Some of the scariest yards I’ve been to are the ones that have a person lying in a coffin that pops out at random moments. You can either build your own- (one person spray painted a refrigerator box and cut a lid out of it) or buy one, which can get expensive depending on the amount of detail you go into. You could also toss out the coffin and simply jump out at people if you have a convenient location.

8. Ghosts-
I don't care if you say this is too cliché, ghosts can scare the pants off of people if they pop out of nowhere and manage to look unearthly. Cheesecloth makes a great fabric for making ghosts, just make sure you cover any support poles you use so it doesn't look too cheesy. (Ha, ha)

9. Random props-
You can use just about anything to spice your yard up, from tombstones to body parts. Some of my favorites I found are: Eyes, Ears, and Fingers Assortment, Skinned left arm and leg, a heart, Peeled-Off Face, and the Bag O' Bones.

10. A Scary Costume-
Hopefully, this is obvious. I hope that no one would be as dimwitted as to spend so much time on their yard they would forget the most important part of a scary set up. Some of the best (if you’re willing to spend the money) I’ve ever seen are the Creature Reacher collection. Or you can always go as a generic zombie, which can scare the living daylights out of people if you do it properly. (Hint: for that lovely undead look, try combining black and white cream paint, and don't forget the blood!)


In case you’re wondering, I don't have the scariest yard on the block. I'm hoping next year to be able to get a costume website to sponsor an amazing one (By letting them put a giant sign in the yard) Chances are slim that it'll happen this year, but if you’re interested, let me know. All the products featured on this page come from http://www.frightcatalog.com/ if anyone is wondering.


-Mer
Questions, Comments, or have a Story Idea? E-Mail Mer- purplepineappletown@hotmail.com

Peeps Halloween Costume!

I don't know about you guys, but I share a love of Peeps almost as much as -RoG- from I-mockery.com. Well, Today in my browsing, I found the Best Halloween Costumes EVER! That's right folks, you can be a Marshmallow Peep for Halloween! But not only can YOU be a Peep, so can your children!

Is it me, or does this baby look way too happy? It's creeping me out. And the arms are definetly Photoshopped or digitalized or something.

Source pictures are from- http://www.buycostumes.com/

That's all for now everyone- hope you're having a great day.

-Mer

Questions, Comments, or have a story idea? Contact Mer at purplepineappletown@hotmail.com

Happy Talk Like a Pirate Day Everyone!

If you didn't know, today is national Talk Like a Pirate Day. Yaargh! I've composed an "official" sea shanty to honor this fine occasion.

Arrrghhh....

I am a pirate, sailing the seas,
my dastardly ways bring others to their knees
if you come across me, run the other way please,
because I am a pirate sailing the seas.

Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum,
yo ho ho and a bottle of rum,
yo ho ho and a bottle of rum,
Won't someone pass the rum?

If you cross me I know lots of ways,
to torture and kill you until the end of your days,
we'll keelhaul ya along our pirate ship,
until you come out, ya drip!

Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum,
yo ho ho and a bottle of rum,
yo ho ho and a bottle of rum,
Won't someone pass the rum?

Happy Talk Like a Pirate Day ye scurvy scallywags!

-Mer
Questions or Comments, or have a story idea? E-mail Mer at purplepineappletown@hotmail.com

Andrew Meyer- Where's Our Free Speech Rights Now?

Most of you know the story of 21-year old university student Andrew Meyer from Florida who got tasered at a John Kerry political rally.

The news says he was reportedly pulled away from the microphone after "loudly and repeatedly trying to ask Senator Kerry questions at a campus forum." It's not the tone he was asking in, it was the questions he was asking. Campus police pulled him away after he asked about impeaching Bush and whether or not Kerry and Bush were a part of the Yale secret society, Skull and Bones. Senator Kerry was going to answer the question and even can be heard saying on the video, "It's all right, let me answer his question," as campus police seized Andrew Meyer. Do we really live in a day and age where a person can't ask a question about the standing President without spending a night in jail? No other president in history has gotten away with this level of secrecy.

Have our free speech rights gone completely out the window? Jeff and Nicole Rank, who live in Corpus Christi, TX, were arrested at the President's Fourth of July speech for wearing Anti-Bush shirts. They were charged with trespassing. How were they trespassing if it was a public event? Will the next generation of American's be known as the "censored generation?" Will we just become accustomed to our free speech rights becoming, "We support free speech, but not really, you can't wear anything that criticizes prominent people."

Just some food for thought.
-Mer

Blue Earth County Fair '07

We're going on an adventure Charlie~ Charlie the Unicorn

Yes, you're seeing things correctly, that's a tank. Someone in Waseca, MN, wants to make a course that you can drive tanks around on. But look! You can get a free tank ride! That will be a great way to teach the kiddies good morals!
Larry the Tank is ready for you to take a ride and crush civilians to smithereens. Are you up to the challenge?
One of the more odd finds at this year's county fair was Bernie the Burn Barrel. It's part of a campaign to get people to stop burning their trash and causing such harmful diseases as bronchitis, asthma, liver damage, smog, and carbon monoxide. I didn't realize smog and carbon monoxide were medical conditions, but thanks to Bernie the Burn Barrel, now I do!
Let me get this straight... the toxins eat the grass, which eats the cow, which eats the humans. That makes a lot of sense. Once again, thanks to Bernie the Burn Barrel for bringing this matter into the light.
For some odd reason, I got a real kick out of the Pop Water Coffe sign. You mustn't criticise his spelling, or the dough boy gnome will beat you over the head with a rolling pin. (For those who don't know, Lefse is a potato tortilla type thing)
This guy just really creeps me out. I will eat you after I finish rolling my beard out into delicious Lefse that I will sell to the people, causing them to become gnome zombies!
I couldn't decide if the sheriff lady on the right was sleeping or dead, so I simply settled on boring and moved on...

To the All-American Lumberjack Show! Isn't that a pathetic little sign for such a manly occupation? They should have a giant statue of a chainsaw or Paul Bunyan for Pete's sake, not something that looks like it belongs at a cheap garage sale.
One of the attractions of the All-American Lumberjack show was a set up allowing you to compete against someone in a log rolling competition- the two guys about to do it fared horribly, both somehow managing to belly flop into the water at the same time after about 2 seconds.
We now come to the heart of the Blue Earth County Fair, the Agriculture, which isn't surprising since Garden City, MN, is an island in a sea of cornstalks and soybean fields.
This thing looked like ti was ready to go abduct someone and take them to their little alien leaders. In reality though, I believe it was a custom air vent for a barn... or was it?
This cracked me up bad. I really wanted a coaster with this on it, but they were completely out, which made me sad. I was quickly cheered up however, with free popcorn from some church nearby.

I should mention that the last day of the fair, it poured down rain the entire day, which made the whole fairgrounds a damp, muddy mess. I wasn't able to get pictures because it was raining so hard. It made an enjoyable day for all!

-Mer

Questions or Comments on this story , or have a story idea? E-mail Mer @ purplepineappletown@hotmail.com